


Five things about a ship

by kiki_92



Series: Kiki's headcanons [4]
Category: Tom Clancy's Rainbow Six (Video Games)
Genre: Multi, Request Meme, Romance and friendship, Shipping, headcanons
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-10
Updated: 2020-04-26
Packaged: 2021-02-28 21:53:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 18
Words: 7,054
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23094379
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kiki_92/pseuds/kiki_92
Summary: A recollection of all the"Send me a ship and I’ll tell you the first 5 things that come to mind when I think about it"asks I have (and still am) answering on Tumblr. I will tag all ships and characters, and chapters will be named according to the ships.  These are my very subjective views and headcanons about the characters and pairings.
Relationships: Alexsandr "Tachanka" Senaviev/Dominic "Bandit" Brunsmeier, Dominic "Bandit" Brunsmeier/Gilles "Montagne" Touré, Dominic "Bandit" Brunsmeier/Max "Mozzie" Goose, Dominic "Bandit" Brunsmeier/Ryad "Jackal" Ramírez Al-Hassar, Dominic "Bandit" Brunsmeier/Shuhrat "Fuze" Kessikbayev, Eliza "Ash" Cohen/Emmanuelle "Twitch" Pichon, Gilles "Montagne" Touré/Alexandr "Tachanka" Senaviev, Marius "Jäger" Streicher/Emmanuelle "Twitch" Pichon, Mark "Mute" Chandar/Shuhrat "Fuze" Kessikbayev, Masaru "Echo" Enatsu/Chul Kyung "Vigil" Hwa, Mike "Thatcher" Baker/Jordan "Thermite" Trace, Mike "Thatcher" Baker/Olivier "Lion" Flament, Miles "Castle" Campbell/Eliza "Ash" Cohen, Morowa "Clash" Evans/Taina "Caveira" Pereira, Ryad "Jackal" Ramírez Al-Hassar/Grace "Dokkaebi" Nam, Saif "Oryx" Al-Hadid/Seamus "Sledge" Cowden, Seamus "Sledge" Cowden/Adriano "Maestro" Martello, Seamus "Sledge" Cowden/Marius "Jäger" Streicher, Shuhrat "Fuze" Kessikbayev/Alexsandr "Tachanka" Senaviev, Sébastien "Buck" Côté/Timur "Glaz" Glazkov
Series: Kiki's headcanons [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1364434
Comments: 7
Kudos: 91





	1. Glaz/Buck

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **jes-jones asked:** Buck/Glaz :)
> 
> I want to apologize in advance if it’s probably more friendship-y than properly shippy overall, I tried (but I can’t really see any of the Spetsnaz with any of the Canadians).

1) Having them on the same room means either long silences of witty banter and jokes. Buck was surprised to discover that side of Glaz, since the sniper usually gives off the impression at first of being quiet and cold/detacheted. Glaz replied people underestimate him constantly, and the smirk coupled with how he intently stares at people while sketching in that notebook of his made for a slightly unsettling answer.

2) Shooting competitions. Buck is a decent marksman, but Glaz always wins and he likes to show off. The Canadian is determined to win even if it’s only once, but he’s beginning to accept that unless he resorts to some sort of trick or cheating, his chances are slim. At least he’s still the undisputed champion of snowball fights, and he’ll admit feeling a surge of satisfaction whenever a plump ball of snow hits the sniper square in the face.

3) Glaz is the only of the Russians who attempts to improve the relationship between the Spetsnaz and the JTF2, and he renews his efforts after getting closer to Buck. On his part, Buck tries to help him and even made an effort in getting to know the other Russians as well. The results are not as bad nor uncomfortable as he thought it would be, even if the rest of the Spetsnaz seem to distrust him. The tension between both CTUs is still present, but lesser than it used to be.

4) Being close to Glaz means being asked to pose for him. Buck still finds a little unnerving how the sniper’s focused gaze will asses him while drawing, but he’s learnt there’s a lot of warmth beneath the sharpness. Glaz will often gift him the portraits and sketches of him he’s done, and Buck even sent one of the cleanest portraits to his mom. She loved it. When he relayed her praise to Glaz, he saw a rare occurrence: Glaz blushed.

5) While everyone in Rainbow trains hard, watching the Spetsnaz spar made Buck think they were trying to kill each other for real. Sometimes he has a bit of trouble remembering Glaz is as deadly as they come, whether he has a weapon in his hands or not. The same hands that are so talented when drawing/painting too, and cooking as well. It makes Buck wonder at what else those hands can excel in. ~~And maybe Buck has a competence kink~~


	2. Ash/Twitch

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Anonymous asked:** Ash/Twitch

1) Ash feels protective of Twitch, due to her youth and idealism. It’s not that Ash thinks of her as someone naive, but she would like to shield her from things that might make Twitch jaded like most people around them, her fresh outlook on life and sweet personality are precious and an integral part of her. On he side, Twitch feels the need to protect Ash on the field, and she’s sure that watching Ash rush into a building with no intel will give her gray hairs before she’s even thirty.

2) Twitch is amused and resigned about Ash’s rivalry with Mira. The Spanish woman is a decent boss and a friend of Twitch, who collaborates with her in the R&D department often, and it would make her happy if those two buried the hatchet. Still, Twitch sometimes will join Ash in her bitching about the tight control Mira exerts over any gadget modifications. Yes, she’s salty Mira denied her idea of making her drone jump, and Ash is furious she was denied the possibility of creating different types of breaching rounds.

3) Ash is too harsh on herself, and always seems to be worrying about what could go wrong; and whevenr something unplanned happens (accident, enemy ambush, etc), Twitch will be there for her and to gently remind Ash she’s blameless cause she can’t foresee the future nor control everything.

4) Twitch is more easy going and social than Ash, so it surprised her when Ash was the one to propose dressing as cowboys and doing something different and more lighthearted for training, an gladly agreed to find her people willing to particiapte. They all kept their costumes, and afterwards Twitch and Ash have played as cowgirl and bandit more than once in a more intimate setting.

5) While they both love their respective families, they also have not a great desire to spend time with them. Ash resents her controlling grandma, and Twitch gets tired of the competetiviness between herself and her sister. Both Ash and Twitch feel like only they understand each other’s reticence to go spend time with their respective families, since everyone else on their teams just give them puzzled looks when the issue comes up. Surprisingly, they do get along pretty well with each other’s family, which was a relief for both of them.


	3. Jackal/Dokkaebi

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Anonymous asked:** Jackal/Dokkaebi for the five things challenge [I will continue to ask for and about this rare pair to anyone until it goes main stream]

1) Late nights, so many of them: Dokkaebi coding and Jackal pestering her about what is she doing and listening to her explanations while not understanding much, marathoning movies and series, sometimes just gossiping, and of course there are those times they don’t speak that much and just explore each other’s bodies. Usually Dokkaebi falls asleep first, of course, but Jackal doesn’t mind staying in bed with her, holding her, it feels quite peaceful actually.

2) Since he isn’t called to train that often due to his insomnia related problems ~~yes this is how I’m justifying his high ban rate lmao~~ , he often found himself in company of Echo, who is a friend of Dokkaebi and tried in his own awkward way to warn him off of hurting Dokkaebi in any way. When Jackal can train tho, he and Dokkaebi become an unstoppable duo on the field; Jackal teaching Dokkaebi how to track someone in his style, and her using her hacking to make sure nobody will ambush Jackal as he hunts down his target and watching his back.

3) The sugar daddy jokes got old pretty quickly, and to be honest neither of them found those funny to start with. Yes, they both are acutely aware of the huge age difference, that was exactly the reason Jackal didn’t flirt much with her in the beginning, he didn’t want to come across as a creep and much less when he wasn’t even sure if she liked him or not.

4) They are constantly craving food from their respective countries and making each other taste what they cook as well. Dokkaebi wasn’t impressed with paella but loved the potato and onion omelette, and also the grilled fish and seafood with garlic and parsley. On her part, watching Jackal try to keep a straight face as he tried her extra spicy kimchi was hilarious, but he greatly enjoyed the dumplings and bulgogi.

5) Lots of dancing! Both love to dance, and when Jackal is happy (formerly a rare occasion, but he smiles a lot more lately to Mira’s relief) he’ll often bring Dokkaebi out to have a drink or two, and inevitably they end up dancing. He’s had to refrain himself from breaking a few dude’s faces who took many liberties with her, but watching Dokkaebi wipe the smile out of their faces just with her sharp tongue never fails to amuse (and comfort) Jackal. She’s gorgeous and capable and fierce, and somehow she likes him, the insomniac wreck. That’s proof enough for him that miracles exist.


	4. Bandit/Jackal

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **thedragonsarealive asked:** For your shippping game, I would like to ask about... Mmm... BanditJackal. Someee ThermiteThatcher and some ThatcherLion!
> 
> Only Bandit/Jackal in this "chapter"

1) Jackal wasn’t truly trying to snatch Bandit’s potential dates from him, he was actually flirting with Bandit but nobody seemed to notice. Then, when he gave up and started to actively pursue random one night flings, Bandit would always appear by his side and ruin his chances, and while Jackal supposed it was payback (which he was adamant he didn’t deserve) it was also flattering to think Bandit was paying attention to him for once. Seeing as they were out of options, they started to joke about sleeping together… until it wasn’t a joke anymore.

2) Bandit has some ptsd from his time undercover, even if he’s unwilling to admit it, and Jackal has his insomnia and thirst for a decades old revenge. Somehow, they are actually a good influence on each other, calling out the bullshit and bluntly stating a few truths when one of them gets into one of their darker moods. Yes, it usually ends up in a fight, but then they’ll also eventually meet up in the roof with a few beers and quietly talking about what’s been bothering them (and admiting the other might have been right).

3) They both insist they aren’t a couple. Jackal will say they’re friends with benefits, Bandi insists they’re frenemies with benefits at most. If someone asks them about why they go on dates then, they’ll say it’s not a date, just a friendly outing and sometimes it’s convenient to have someone to drag with you into stuff because being by yourself gets tiresome. Mira and the rest of the GSG9 will roll their eyes when they hear that, because it’s not like these two have nobody else around nor other friends.

4) Lots of pranks targeting Jackal, but they’re usually aimed at getting a laugh out of him rather than making people laugh at him. On the other hand, Jackal occasionally retaliates by doing something mildly romantic in public, like giving Bandit flowers or a small gift, or even kissed his hand once like he was a damsel. Bandit, of course, would rebuff him with crude remarks, but Jackal knows he kept the flowers and the plushie/chocolates/whatever he got him.

5) Lots of impromptu traveling, just hopping on Bandit’s bike and going around to see what they find and explore Greece (well, the area around the new base, anything at half a day distance from there at most), trying to mingle around the locals despite sticking out like a sore thumb most of the time. Jackal keeps offering to drive, but Bandit refuses him to touch his bike unless he’s riding behind him, and he can consider himself fortunate enough because when Bandit heard a similar petition from Mozzie he banned the Australian from even being too close to the bike under any circumstances.


	5. Thatcher/Thermite

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **thedragonsarealive asked:** For your shippping game, I would like to ask about... Mmm... BanditJackal. Someee ThermiteThatcher and some ThatcherLion!
> 
> Only Thatcher/Thermite in this "chapter"

1) At first Thatcher barely paid any attention to Thermite, dismissing him as another jokester, just less annoying than Smoke but equally harebrained. Then they started teaming up during training, and that somehow translated into spending time together outside work too, like going drinking together. And sooner than Thatcher could know, he was getting alarmingly attached to the loud Texan breacher.

2) Despite the age gap, and their wildly different characters, they somehow actually fit well together. Thatcher discovered that behind his laid back and goofy exterior, Jordan also had a keen mind and wasn’t nearly as reckless as he thought. In turn, Thermite greatly appreciated Mike’s directness and sarcasm, and despite his appearances of being and old-fashioned fool regarding technology, he knew more than he let on. And his occasional lapses of knowledge were quite endearing to Thermite, who relished the occasion to enlighten him and hear Thatcher disparage about technology in his unique and witty way.

3) Thatcher was reluctant to let their relationship progress, not because Thermite was a man, but because of their age difference. It would be selfish of him to saddle Thermite with someone who was nearing retirment already. Sooner rather than later, he’d be another person Jordan would be mourning, and Thatcher would rather shoot himself than make Thermite go through that. Unfortunately, rejecting him would also hurt Jordan, and Thatcher was now remembering why he’d sworn off relationships after his divorce, there’s no winning even when he tries to do the right thing.

4) After many failed attempts at talking about it, and a few arguments too, Thermite exasperetedly remined him it wasn’t something Thatcher could decide for him, much less when Thermite wanted to be with him and Thatcher apparently too, when he wasn’t being a foolish noble idiot. “I want to be with you, treasure our time together so when one of us is gone the other can have these wonderful memories.” After hearing that, Thatcher started heeding Doc’s advice about his health a bit more often, just to make sure they had as many years together as possible.

5) They both cook in the same way: greasy and fried. Fish and chips, nuggets, bacon and fried eggs, etc. Thermite got some burns over his old burns from splashing grease while cooking, and Thatcher will always frown and wait with aloe cream for his abused skin. Doesn’t matter if Thermite insists it doesn’t hurt much because he barely has any sensibility there unless it’s on the pad of his fingers, but he still will let Thatcher take care of it (because he loves having Thatcher touching him in any way, ~~although it’s better when he’s allowed to touch back, iykwim~~


	6. Thatcher/Lion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **thedragonsarealive asked:** For your shippping game, I would like to ask about... Mmm... BanditJackal. Someee ThermiteThatcher and some ThatcherLion!
> 
> Only Thatcher/Lion in this "chapter"

1) After the infamous argument that ended with a physical scuffle, both Thatcher and Lion were content to avoid or glare at each other from a distance. Ironically, it was Doc who sort of pushed them together, lecturing them and blaming their inability to act as adults for the tension between the SAS and GIGN since the incident. That and Thatcher’s guilt over the mess he caused, and the relentless and definitely mean pranks Smoke kept pulling on Lion, were what pushed him to go and apologize to Lion for hitting him. ~~Even if Thatcher was convinced he’d do the same again if they went back in time~~.

2) They still argued constantly, Thatcher disdaining Lion’s gadget of choice, and Lion calling Thatcher an old fossil. Somehow, their constant exchange of barbs leaves them seeking each other again and again, and other ops have joked this is like foreplay to them. They aren’t totally wrong. Lion still doesn’t know why he keeps seeking Thatcher, wanting his approval and yet always searching to argue with him too. On the other hand, Thatcher swears the Frenchman is a pest and he’d rather not deal with him, yet he also rejoices everytime they’re part of the same team.

3) Bonding over having a complicated past regarding their love life? More likely than you think! As far as Thatcher can see, Lion’s situation doesn’t differ much from his own after getting a divorce. He’ll admit that Lion is at least making an effort to keep a relationship with his son, and Thatcher can respect and admire that. Lion might be a knob, but he tries damn hard to be better. And his face when Thatcher told him that was priceless.

4) An absurd amount of pining, yet neither of them would even recognize they were pining for each other. They were just coworkers who got along, work friends maybe. And yet they kept inviting the other out for dinner, but since it wasn’t to fancy places it didn’t count as a date, did it? Or the constant glances when they met each other around the base, which their respective teams immediately picked up (and teased them for it).

5) Even after getting together their relationship progresses at a slow pace, but after his reckless youth phase, Lion actually treasures this slow pace. To him, the first time they had sex, after months of dating and even more months of not-quite-dating, felt a thousand times more intimate and satisfying than all the mindless sex he had on the first dates during those dark years. Perhaps that’s a sign he changed, for the better Lion hopes. 


	7. Sledge/Jäger

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **tsarethan asked:** If you're still accepting asks jager and sledge please lovely 💜💛  
>  **something-in-red asked:** Sledge/Jager

1) Sledge showed an unusual interest in helping Jäger test new gadgets and improvements, and the reason behind that is mostly because he likes to spend time with Jäger. And also because he likes to use his hammer for testing how resistant those gadgets are, He’s also given some wild ideas that Jäger was eager to try but Mira vetoed. 

2) Jäger is fascinated (and more than a little turned on) by how strong (and tall) Sledge is, and how he can lift up Jäger like he weighs nothing. He tried to lift up the caber once and it almost felt like he was trying to lift Thor’s hammer, nearly collapsed during an attempt to swing it.

3) Lots of late nights when Sledge would have to drag Jäger to bed, cause the German would be either still on the workshop tinkering, or caught up watching documentary after documentary without realising how late it was. Usually Jäger is still to entranced by what he was doing and will be unable to go to sleep, so they end up curled together in the couch or in bed, Jäger talking Sledge’s ears off until he starts to fall asleep in his arms. Sledge doesn’t really mind it, he loves hearing Jäger rant excitedly about the stuff he likes, it’s so cute, and he gets to cuddle with him too!

4) Jäger feels a little awkward around Thatcher, but he and Sledge are good friends, so he tries his best, even if he never knows what to talk about with the old Brit. It doesn’t matter, Jäger is well regarded and beloved by the SAS, especially after restoring those old planes for their base in Hereford. 

5) While Sledge cuts an imposing figure, and is easy going, and people often look at him for leadership, that doesn’t mean he doesn’t feel strained or overwhelmes by his position sometimes. And whenever he’s needed support, Jäger has always been there for him, with his somewhat distracted but unflinchingly caring nature. To him, going out of his way to reassure Jäger that he loves him when their duties keep them apart seems like an insignificant price to pay to have him by his side.


	8. Ash/Castle

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Anonymous asked:** Ash x Castle? :)

1) Ash has trouble opening up to people and feeling comfortable enough with them. Castle is one of the few people she feels completely at ease with, and the first person who gained her unconditional trust. She knows he respects her, and trusts in her as well, both as a friend (and partner) and as a leader.

2) They often train and spar together, although Castle keeps inviting different people as well, both because he is used to cooperating with other units and because he simply is friendly. And because it’s good for Ash to be on good terms and open up to more people. Especially since her tendency to rush to judge people and her temper have landed her in more than one rivalry.

3) While she is closest to Castle, obviously, the whole of the FBI team is like a small family, and Ash has compared Pulse to a brother more than once, and also stated that Thermite is like a dumb little brother to her. When she and Castle started dating, Thermite and Pulse started to jokingly refer as them as mom and dad, and the monikers caught on. Now they’re _Papa and Mama bear_ for many, ~~but that’s alway said when Ash isn’t around to hear it~~.

4) Castle loves his dogs, but he knows they act skittish and aren’t fit to be around boisterous people, since they come from abusive houses and might react badly to certain gestures even if they are friendly. He’s so happy that Ash warmed up to them in a heartbeat, and in fact, whenever she’s troubled he’ll find her sitting with one of the dogs, petting them. She says she finds it calming and allows her to think more clearly.

5) Castle adores Ash’s hair, loves raking his fingers through it and braiding it for her. It’s looks bright like fire, but it’s also soft and lovely, and on his more poetic moments he thinks that’s a rather good description of Ash herself. Besides, she makes those cute sighs when he plays with her hair, and to be honest he loves seeing it sprawling on the bedsheets too, like a firey halo surrounding her when they have sex.


	9. Tachanka/Fuze

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **mxcha-lxtteez asked:** Tachanka/Fuze headcanons, please?  
>  **Anonymous asked:** Could I please get some Tachanka/Fuze headcanons? [perhaps one nsfw one? this ones optional]

1) Tachanka doesn’t let anyone touch his collection of antique weapons, no one. Except for Fuze. He says it’s because Fuze deeloped his own weapon and he’s the only engineer Tachanka can sort of trust with his antiques, but in truth they often work together repairing the battered old weapons.

2) Fuze is not a social person, nor a very publicly affectionate one either, while Tachanka might be brash but he’s also a people person, and quite affectionate. The first time he dragged Fuze to sit on his lap, in front of the rest of Rainbow, Fuze went rigid like an ironing board. It was only when Tachanka started groping him as he always did that Fuze threatened him with bodily harm unless he stopped. He’s grown more comfortable with PDA, same as Tachanka has learnt to restrain himself _a bit_.

3) Family life is a complicated issue. Fuze refuses to talk about his brother with anyone, Tachanka’s kids don’t know yet their dad is dating one of his comrades. Then there’s the fact that neither of them wants to marry (Tachanka already did that and screwed it up once, Fuze broke off his engagement days before the wedding), but they skirt around the issue instead of sitting down to talk about it.

4) Unlike other happy couples, they haven’t considered moving out into their own apartment, they simply bunked together on one of the bigger rooms at the base that was it. Although they did get a double bed instead of keeping two single ones, otherwise sleeping together was impossible since two beefy men like them cannot fit in a narrow single bed no matter how close they squish together.

5) Maybe it’s a habit from when they weren’t rooming together, maybe it’s just because Tachanka is a controlling bastard when they have sex, but 9 out of 10 time Fuze will find himself bent over the nearest surface, Tachanka’s hands holding him in place. Or he will hoist Fuze up against the wall. And while Fuze will admit it’s pretty fucking hot, for longer sessions he will convince Tachanka to just wait a few more seconds until they get to their bed. Table fucking is great for a quickie, but for a drawn out night of sex Fuze prefers the comfort of a matress instead of the edges of whatever furniture digging into him.


	10. Sledge/Maestro

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Anonymous asked:** If your asks are open for headcanons, may we have some Sledge/Maestro headcanons? It’s one of my favorite ships, and there’s almost no content of it

1) For a time, Sledge was convinced that Maestro had a crush on Thatcher, since he acted a bit like a starstruck fan around the older SAS op. It took Smoke joking about it with Maestro during one of their boxing matches for Maestro to have a serious talk with Sledge. Yes, Sledge had assumed the flirting was nothing conclusive, just the way Maestro was. However, when thinking about it, he realised Maestro only flirted with Sledge. “But you’ve been doing that since we met!” “Yes, and have I done that with anyone else, _cuore mio?_ ” It was quite a revelation for Sledge to know that Maestro had been interested in him since the start.

2) Maestro prides himself in his cooking abilities, and he even tries some Scottish recipes he knows Sledge loves. He personally doesn’t care one bit for eatign haggis, but Sledge likes it when he mixes Scottish and Italian dishes, and even better, he’ll help Maestro cook even if usually Sledge isn’t very fond of cooking. 

3) Maestro sings while he does chores, or any sort of manual work to be honest. Sometimes he just humms (and only realises he was doing that if Sledge points it out), others he sings the lyrics in a sort of hushed whisper or loud enough to seem like he’s doing a concert if Sledge is nearby. It’s rather adorable, at least in Sledge’s opinion. Curiously enough, Maestro does not sing in the shower, unlike Sledge. He loves knowing all those small details about the Italian.

4) While Maestro is arguably the most traditionally romantic of them both, Sledge is quite the romantic during sex. He prefers to take it slow and be able to look at each other’s face. This is the opposite of a problem for Maestro, and he adores the glowing expression in Sledge’s face in those moments their eyes lock during what already was a very intimate moment.

5) Neither of them is planning to retire anytime soon, but they like to talk what they will do once their time in Rainbow ends: the places they will visit and travel to, the villa they will buy and reform on the Italian countryside, how many dogs they’ll have, etc.


	11. Bandit/Mozzie

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **thefishychicken asked:** What about Bandit/Mozzie?

1) They both love bikes, the difference being that while Bandit takes care of his like it’s a treasure, Mozzie is considerably more reckless with his. All the bike tricks Mozzie does lookes cool though, so Bandit wanted to learn too, using Mozzie’s bike tho (Bandit’s is out of limits for this kind of tomfoolery).

2) Pulling crazy stunts, imaginative pranking, and constant joking make them the center of attention of whatever place they’re in, and yet oftentimes it’s like they’re on a bubble of their own and barely notices anyone else in the room. They feed into each other’s most boisterous tendencies, and the result tends to be explosive (not literally, thankfully). 

3) Mozzie’s level of profanity when angry can put to shame what Bandit learnt in his time around the Hell’s Angels, it’s fascinating. Bandit only has to make some remark about height (doesn’t even have to target Mozzie directly) and he’ll go off like fireworks. The makeouts and sex are more intense if Mozzie’s mildly riled up, so yes, Bandit sometimes does it on purpose, but always keeping in mind to not aggravate him too much. Just a bit of friendly ribbing, that’s all.

4) They both are amazing dealing with children, and Bandit was very pleased that one time Mozzie met (and instantly won over) his nephews. Perhaps, if they settled down in the future, getting a kid or two of their own wouldn’t be so bad, even if Bandit is lowkey terrified of being anyone’s dad (too much responsability, he sometimes feels like he isn’t even fit to take care of himself).

5) Dating Mozzie (or being fuckbuddies, or whatever the hell they are) means that Bandit spends a lot of time being under Gridlock’s gaze, since she and Mozzie might as well be siblings given the way they act. She threatened to break Bandit’s legs if he was only playing with Mozzie, he made some crude jokes and she laughed. Now they get along reasonably well, which is a relief, and having someone to help him repair his beloved bike is also nice.


	12. Tachanka/Bandit

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Anonymous asked:** Bandit x Tachanka? Personally I feel like Bandit would be a bratty bottom with him as far as a relationship goes, I just can't see Tachanka giving up control, but I wanna know your headcannons

1) It began as a random hook up, a convenient way to get laid and relieve stress. And okay, maybe Bandit was curious about how well endowed Tachanka was and whether he knew how to use that well or not. The answer was a really satisfied Bandit slinking away from Tachanka’s room next morning.

2) Bandit didn’t expect Tachanka to, well, cling to him. Sort of. Nothing too annoying, but it was shocking that the older defender would be sort of _affectionate_ with him, or would want to spend more time together aside from training. It was surprising, but not unwelcome.

3) It’s inherent in Bandit’s nature to test boundaries, like a rebellious kid trying to discover how far he can go before it’s _too_ far. He didn’t expect Tachanka to discipline him for it later on, although Bandit has to admit that now the promise of a punishment is part of what drives him to keep pushing like he sometimes does. “If you want to be spanked, you can just ask,” Tachanka laughs, but Bandit likes this sort of game they have going.

4) They haven’t talked about what they have, they haven’t acknowledged they’re in a relationship of any sort, flirting with other people or sleeping around should be totally fine because they’re not together. That’s the theory, but then Bandit sees Tachanka charming up someone else and he feels the urge to get in between them and push them apart. Well, that answers the question of whether Bandit wants something more than just casual fucking.

5) Despite Tachanka being a lot more calm than most people give him credit for, they tend to amplify each other’s emotions more often than not. So if one of them gets angry, the other ends up angry too, and if that is directed at a third party, it might end in an honest to God brawl and them being scolded by Harry (and not giving a fuck about it).


	13. Fuze/Mute

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Anonymous asked:** Fuze/Mute headcannons please?

1) Neither of them is very talkative, which means they spend large swaths of time doing stuff in silence. This has lead to more then one person to think that Mute and Fuze don’t get along, which is not true. They appreciate being able to be together without having to fill in the silences constantly.

2) They don’t do PDA, except maybe if they both are extremely drunk, which doesn’t happen often either. Coupled with the first point, it’s no surprise nobody had any clue those two were together until one day Mute tells the rest of the SAS that he can’t go to the pub with them cause he has a date. Turns out he and Fuze had already been dating for months at this point.

3) Fuze asks his fellow Spetsnaz what to do after he and Mute have a rather heated argument. He is convinced he is right, and so is Mute, and they’re both too stubborn to apologize at the moment. Tachanka tells him to bring flowers or chocolates to Mute, which Fuze dismisses since the brit doesn’t like either of those. Kapkan advises to wait, which Fuze isn’t keen on doing. Glaz says he can fuck his partner into oblivion, since that works quite well in his experience ~~and he gets yelled at by Kapkan for saying this~~ , or to just fucking _talk_ with him. Fuze takes the first part of that last one seriously and curiously enough, the talking part comes quite naturally afterwards.

4) Mute wanted to prove to Fuze he’s got the brains and the brawn, after all he’s part of the SAS and has seen his fair share of battles. He didn’t take into account the old piece of wisdom that ran across the base: if you get a Spetsnaz as a sparring partner, you’re fucked. He thinks the bruises might be worth it when Fuze lays down on bed with him and kisses all his sore spots.

5) It’s not always easy juggling traditions from four cultures between the two of them: Russian and Uzbek for Fuze, British and Indian for Mute. It helps that neither of them is very traditional and they barely observe any holidays except for the ones they want (more like remember, tbh) and when they have free time, especially since they would rather spend more time in the workshop if it was up to them. 


	14. Montagne/Bandit

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Anonymous asked:** Can I please get Montagne/Bandit for the 5 things about a ship thing?

1) Montagne seems to be immune to Bandit’s pranks. Bandit uses those to rile people up or grab their attention, so having Montagne react as if it was just a minor inconvenience sucked the fun out of it, so he stopped. Besides, he never felt more like an asshole than that one time he made the floors extra slippery and after sending Monty crashing into several people, the Frenchman asked _Bandit_ if he was alright, because his drink got spilled during the chaos. Montagne is just too damn nice to be pranked.

2) Bandit gets cold easily but hates being the little spoon, since he describes it as suffocating and feeling trapped, especially with such a big partner as Montagne. The solution? He always cuddles up to Montagne like a baby koala, hugging his back and basking in the warmth Montagne radiates.

3) For someone who seemed rather reticent to bring their relationship to a more physical level, and who clearly was more comfortable taking things slow, Montagne did not disappoint Bandit when they finally had sex. Bandit had been bracing himself for an inexperienced partner maybe, thinking this had to be Montagne’s first time with another man, but it seems his ideas were unfounded. Montagne had been as eager to please him as Bandit had been eager to let him do what he wanted.

4) Bandit had never considered himself extremely territorial nor jealous, but seeing him being so affectionate with Lion rubs him the wrong way. Perhaps it’s because Bandit thinks Montagne is way out of his league and sooner or later he’ll realise that too; or because he can see part of his attitude in Lion, including a certain infatuation with the shield bearer. Bandit can’t blame Lion for it since he feels the same, but seeing Montagne give the other attacker a friendly hug makes him grit his teeth.

5) They are the sort of couple nobody can understand how they came to be, their personalities seem mismatched and their temperaments and interests so different that Bandit’s friends thought he was pulling a joke on them when he introduced Montagne as his partner/boyfriend, and wondered how he managed to make the Frenchman play along. After just a brief time observing them though, it became apparent they truly were joking and appeared to be besotted with each other.


	15. Oryx/Sledge

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **dep-yoo-tew asked:** Is it too soon for Oryx/Sledge? 🤔

1) Barring a few exceptions, Sledge is used being the tallest and also one of the buffest guys around in every situation. He was unnerved the first time Oryx charged against him and tackled him to the ground, but he was even more alarmed and intrigued when Oryx lifted him up with ease.

2) There’s this running joke at the base of likening Sledge’s hammer with Mjolnir, since not many can lift it and yet everyone’s eager to try. It really shouldn’t have been a surprise that Oryx was able to lift it, but then Smoke and Mute had started to chant “He’s worthy, he’s worthy of a date with Seamus!” and maybe that was what surprised Sledge.. he’s not sure.

3) They had the idea of having a breaching competition, but the results were not what Sledge had expected. He watched horrified how Oryx smashed through and wanted to go for a fourth even as his step faltered for a moment, and promptly put a stop on it before Oryx concussed himself. “You’re mental, lad, is your head made of iron!?”

4) Oryx is a lot more quiet than Sledge, yet both were able to find common ground in being the second in command of two old and respected operators, since Sledge basically is Thatcher’s right hand man. After establishing a (shaky) mutual undertsanding, interacting outside training was a lot easier.

5) With their strength, they’re more or less constantly trying to one up each other, and that involves a lot of tackling and pinning to the wall while making out furiously. However, it’s all fun and games and really hot until Oryx one time miscalculated his strength, and insted of pressing Sledge against the wall sent both of them _through_ the wall.


	16. Tachanka/Montagne

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Anonymous asked:** For the ship thing, Monty/Tachanka? I love tachanka with a bunch of different operators, but I don’t see much of these two together...
> 
> Thanks a lot to @grain-crain-drain and @dagoth-menthol for their help and ideas, you’re the best! 💕

1) They’re called the cuddle bears by their friends, because both are so damn affectionate and they’re always hugging or cuddling, or sitting and leaning against each other. Whenever one of them comes back from a mission, there will be an epic hug before they even get to the base. The first time it happened, with both of them sprinting towards the other the other ops thought they were about to witness a fight or that they would tackle each other. But no, it was only an epic bear hug.

2) Montagne is often called the GIGN dad because he is naturally caring, and often helps other operators or does favors to people. Small stuff, like offering them a towel first after training, filling up everyone’s glass of water at the table, volunteering to go running with someone if nobody else wanted to go, etc. And after some time, Tachanka was always the first one by his side, ready to grab that towel, or snatch the glass of water, or rope Montagne into training with him. When Montagne asked if there was a reason Tachanka was always hovering around him like that, the answer was _“You keep offering people things, someone will grab it. I just make sure to be the first in line, that’s all.”_ The wink at the end left Monty a little confused tho.

3) They’re both incredibly protective of each other, pity the poor soul who dares disrespect either of them in presence of the other. Montagne style of problem solving is reasoning with the other party and talking things out, stern and firm. Tachanka’s style is glaring down at that person until they realise Tachanka is uge and pissed at them and ready to throw down if they don’t apologize.

4) Big fights are pretty uncommon, but they have small rows fairly often, mostly because Tachanka is so damn stubborn and likes to do things his way and his way only. None of these disagreements last until the end of the day though, because as much as Tachanka seems allergic to apologising sometimes, neither of them really wants to sleep alone, not for something so inconsequential.

5) Despite their appearance, which can be a little intimidating even on the best situations, both are pretty friendly and have a goofy side, as evidenced by how they modified their uniforms for last year’s April Fools. Montagne wasn’t sure Tachanka would agree to it, but he laughed so much listening to his idea and actually was the one who wanted to convince more people to play along with their scheme.


	17. Twitch/Jäger

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **nunez1990 asked:** Hello! I'm new to this, but i have read your headcanons and i really like them. If you have the time could you make a Jäger x twitch headcanon( i thought of this crack ship once and now It's stuck in my head, also i really like headcanons).

1) Being both regulars at the workshop, they quickly became friends, especially because not many people was willing to listen to them rant about their current projects, and they even asked questions and volunteered to help each other. So it was a fast friendship like no other in Rainbow before.

2) They were close, but in the way best friends are close. There was none of the awkwardness Jäger had learnt to associate with having a crush, and he never entertained the idea there could be anything between them, so her efforts at flirting with him just went over his head until she asked him out directly.

3) They don’t go on many dates, preferring to spend time together in the workshop or watching stuff on Netflix, documentaries mostly, even if Twitch insists on occasionally watching movies too. Their friends often joke these two went directly to the “married for years” sort of behaviour due to how they act.

4) There is an undercurrent of rivalry when they face against each other in matches, and they often target each other specifically only shouting “sorry!” cheerily when they down the other. Once training is over though, Jäger will rush to Twitch’s side, asking her if she’s okay and fretting about whether they went too far or not. He only shuts up when she kisses him, since it’s the best way to reassure him.

5) Arguments between them are a bit odd. There’s no shouting at all ever, no angry gestures, barely any glaring. It’s in fact more like a debate, both talking and talking and trying to convince the other they’re in the right. A middle ground is usually found, but it can take the whole day. And amusingly enough, people can’t seem to realise they’re arguing, which is why there’s this idea around the base that Twitch and Jäger had never had a disagreement (wrong, ofc).


	18. Fuze/Bandit

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Anonymous asked:** I honestly feel like this would be one of the most tense ships ever, but for the 5 things about a ship thing, how about Fuze/Bandit? Also who's top/bottom?

1) At first there was only mistrust. Fuze was interested in Jäger, and regarded Bandit with suspicion every time he interrupted them or tried to direct Fuze to talk with him instead of the engineer. To be fair, at the beginning Bandit was only messing with Fuze because he found his reactions funny, and because he knew Jäger was already seeing someone else, so he was doing the Uzbek a favor by preventing him to make a fool of himself, right?

2) After a time, it was common to see Bandit and Fuze being around each other, bickering, sparring (aka, an excuse to hit each other), and watching each other’s movements with too much interest. Fuze used to say he was acting on principle of keeping his enemies close, but that didn’t explain why he actively angaged in Bandit’s shenanigans, since Fuze was well known for being not very talkative, or why he sometimes laughed and smiled at whatever Bandit was saying.

3) Their first kiss was a mistake. They both were drunk, they snuck away from the New Year’s party, and ended making out in the first empty room they found. The awkwardeness that followed the day after was legendary. Fuze kept avoiding Bandit, who was displeased by that and in turn teased Fuze heavily about how he melted in his arms and moaned just with some kisses, which in turn led to a huge argument and Fuze yelling at Bandit that he was a degenerate trying to corrupt him. ~~As always, with them it’s one step forward and two steps back~~.

4) While avoiding each other and being Officially Angry™, Fuze was surprised to discover he actually missed having Bandit around. Not _all the time_ , but still he found himself waiting for Bandit to appear, hear his awful jokes and innuendo, his insightful comments about almost anything, how he would casually point a new idea that helped Fuze in his project a lot, etc. Eventually, after taking some time to process everything, he decided to apologize to Bandit for some of the things he said to the German. However, once he saw him trying to apologize, Bandit clapped him on the back and they spent the night drinking on the rooftop of the base, which was the perfect move to get Fuze to work his way to what he wanted to say, slowly and awkwardly as he always did.

5) When it comes to sex, Bandit was expecting more of a fight for being the top, but Fuze turned out to be more adaptable than he expected, not that Bandit’s gonna complain. They sometimes switch, but even then it’s pretty obvious Bandit is the one calling the shots, presumably because he’s the more experienced one.

**Author's Note:**

> You can say hi and see what I'm currently up to on [my tumblr](http://r6shippingdelivery.tumblr.com/)!


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